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Ooh, have you seen the state of Kim Kardashian’s kitchen?

Kim Kardashian in her kitchen
Kim Kardashian in her kitchen: filthy Photograph: @kimkardashian/instagram

Behold. Kim Kardashian promoting a diet shake she’s apparently using, and wearing a look that says: “My surrogate is due to give birth any day now.”

Like many nesting content providers, Kim has been artfully caught in the act of consuming a weight-loss aid while clad in just a cropped top and a thong. Quite why she’s doing it in the back of your local kebab shop is unclear – but we may not get an answer on that just yet. They do have to keep some plotlines back for Keeping Up With the Kardashians.

Whatever the explanation, you’ll be pleased to discover that the attention lavished upon the photo has centred almost entirely on the kitchen. Specifically, how grubby it looks. And bravo to all involved in this line of inquiry. Faced with one version of physical perfection, there is something brilliantly heroic about ignoring it entirely in favour of making frantically disparaging comments about kitchen hygiene.

“Ooh, did you see that Kim Kardashian’s countertops? Ooh, they’re no better than they should be, are they? Ooh, fancy all that stainless steel and still not able to clean it – she should try the tiles we inherited. It’s been six years since we had the grouting redone and you could still eat your dinner off them. As for that floor, ooh – I wouldn’t risk it without verruca socks, quite frankly …”

Ah, well. You can’t have it all. And no doubt Kim will have a chance to give the kitchen a proper going-over with the Cillit Bang before the new arrival’s bottles and whatnot start their relentless land grab.

This article titled "Ooh, have you seen the state of Kim Kardashian’s kitchen?" was written by Marina Hyde, for The Guardian on Thursday 11 January 2018 06.23pm

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